I think I may have mentioned before how lazy I can be...and if I haven't, I meant to, but, well....I was probably too lazy to do so. Anyway, this has led to my catching a disease, a disease called obesity....which is a real disease that you can catch, like the flu or the AIDS! It's true! I saw a documentary on it!
I kid, I kid...but not really, see, I know that yes, some people are genetically predisposed toward being hefty motherfuckers, hell, I'm one of them thanks to the dodgy thyroid I inherited from my mother, but mostly (as in, in most cases) fat people are fat because, and mark this, they eat too fucking much. This coupled with a laze filled (glaze filled? haha! I'm punny me!) sedentary lifestyle means weight problems, it's not a disease, it doesn't go away by just taking pills or going the gym. In fact, going the gym is detrimental because it makes you think you're doing enough when you're really not. You go the gym and that's it, a mental switch goes on in your head that says "well done, you've gone the gym, you've done enough today." But losing weight, staying trim is not one factor, it's not going the gym, it's not cutting back on junk food, it's not avoiding carbs or whatever new diet is in this weeks lifestyle magazine of your choice...it's all these factors and even more that you may not have even considered, it's not changing just one or two aspects of your life, it's changing your entire life.
So, obesity, I was clinically obese a few years back, weighing in at an impressive 215 lbs for reference, I am 5ft 9, and my BMI was 32 or something and I know that BMI is kinda bullshit as pro athletes can measure in at much >30 on the bmi calculator but be fitter than you could ever hope to be....but on the other hand, this wasn't muscle I was just gunning to win the world eating championship...which one I hear you ask? all of them, i reply....and the amount I ate would not have been all that bad had I actually been doing any exercise, but I never did...it's honestly a wonder I didn't have a heart attack (especially when you consider I have a dodgy heart anyway....I'll tell you about that at another time) and I'm probably going to pay for that later on in life....but yeah, what changed was well....me....in short. I started walking to the shops instead of getting my mum to drive me there, because I spent hours walking around it meant I was eating less in addition to also eating smaller meals when I did eat. I stopped drinking as many fizzy drinks, I cut back on the snacking, I cut back on the alcohol. Not only did I start walking to and from the shops I started walking to and from everywhere I needed to. Sure, it took more time, but that was time spent moving about instead of time spent playing video games or watching tv or reading a book (that last one though, read books a'ight?! they cool!)...I lost close to 40 lbs with those changes, because I stuck to them, and because they were such sweeping changes to my overall lifestyle. It wasn't one thing, it wasn't a fad diet or a gym membership, it was wholesale changes to how I lived my life and that is the way to do it.
Why do I mention it now...basically it's because those changes have hit their peak and I have to change things around again. The other thing is that change is an ongoing thing. People tend to forget that, eventually your body adapts to cope with the stress you're inflicting on it and then boom, it's not as stressful any more...and I hit that stage about half a year ago....I just didn't really realise it until now, so it's time to start changing it around again...and basically, I wanted to give you that message. Being overweight is not some disease, it's not a disability (in most cases), it's a state of mind. You can either fight to improve yourself or say "meh, good enough." which if you mean it is fucking great! I genuinely envy you...but if you're saying it just because you're too lazy and lacking in willpower to do the alternative, then I pity you....later taters.
PS: DO THE TRUFFLE SHUFFLE!
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